Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Found your dick twin last night
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
