what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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