I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
