Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
