My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
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