The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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