i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
