At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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