i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
