first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Randomize
