What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize
