rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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