Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize