I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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