I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
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I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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