rhymes with "ouble enetration"
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
