i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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