I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
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