whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
