Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
its liver damage thursday
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