Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
