brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Randomize
