Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
