Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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