new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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