so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
