just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
