I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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