Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
