And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
