At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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