We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize