im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
