just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
