like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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