how can u be prego again
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
