so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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