you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
