Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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