based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize