Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize