everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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