Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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