He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
