wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
