it hurts more in the daytime
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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