it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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