Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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