ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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