you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
