how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
